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Fifth news item

"You've Got to Sleep With Your Mum and Dad" is now available on Amazon. Childhood angst, marathon swimming, international exploitation and the threat of impending pinniped intimacy. on 2014-08-13
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Fourth news item

Have a look at my page on Amazon. Still plenty of summer left for challenging literature. on 2014-08-13
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Third news item

Check out my Amazon Kindle page. 'The Baby Who Killed People for Money' is now available. An utterly charming child with a unique and lucrative skill. A father with no defence against his daughter's impulses. Would you take your little girl around Europe for a spot of murder tourism? Of course you would. on 2014-06-30
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Second news item

My story on the Tate gallery website on 2013-11-11
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First news item

A Thousand Natural Shocks An anthology that includes two of my stories. Available now at Amazon. on 2013-11-11
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February 2014
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Archive for February 7th, 2014

Posted February 7, 2014
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pyramids011

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Posted February 7, 2014
  Posted by in Uncategorized

This was in about 1994. I decided to spend the 2-week winter break in Egypt.

In conversations with my colleagues, it emerged that two female PE teachers were also flying to Cairo on that break. We laughed about possible coincidences of meeting in the souk, then I forgot about it.

I got off the plane and went through customs. My colleagues were waiting for me. They were with their friends who worked for the US armed forces. Next day, we got a tour of the missile defences of Cairo. There is a ring of communication stations and missile silos encircling the capital, essentially provided and administered by the US.

The servicemen all kept horses at a stable in Giza. One night we went on a moonlight picnic. We rented camels at the stable and a donkey which was to carry the cool-boxes of food and drink. Riding the camel, I found where the Star Wars people had found the wookie noise and was utterly amazed at how many consecutive steps of a camel could yield a distinct fart. We reached some lonely place with palm trees and set up chairs and initial beers. When the donkey caught up, we had a lot to drink.

The next day, we went to the stables in daylight. One of the military guys said ‘You ridden before, Nigel?’

“Yes,” I said, “But…”

“We’ll get you a wiild one.”

I had been about to say that I had ridden a horse once before, an old, slow one who couldn’t see the point of going anywhere, let alone fast.

I got onto this white horse. It seemed docile. Then another horse began to walk past. My horse took this as a challenge. It took off like a drag racer. The other horse sped up. They screamed off over the dunes. I clamped my thighs tight and lowered myself onto the horse’s neck. It interpreted this as a demand for maximum speed. We reached the top of a dune, the other racehorse drew alongside and they pulled up together in a cloud of sand.

“Nice one,” said the experienced horseman.

pyramids01

As you can see, my trousers had ridden up somewhat by then. Then followed a few hours of Lawrence of Arabia fantasy. We galloped between pyramids and tombs. I hadn’t realised that there were so many pyramids in the area.

pyramids03

This picture is taken from Saqqara, past Abi Sir to Giza. Lots of pyramids.

saqqara2

These men were preparing camels for the Imbaba camel market.

pyramids02

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Posted February 7, 2014
  Posted by in Uncategorized

This was from Xian to Datong in December 1988.

After several adventures on hard seat overnight trains, this was my first soft sleep experience. The train was pulled by a QJ 2-10-2 like the one in the picture (that one was at Guilin).

My main reason for going to Datong was the steam locomotive factory but on enquiring about it when I arrived in Datong, I was informed that the last steam engine had rolled out on 21st December. I was a week late.

1988-qj6714-guilin

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Posted February 7, 2014
  Posted by in Uncategorized

This is a volcanic plug in the Glasshouse Mountains in southern Queensland. It’s about 500 metres high and it’s beautiful climbing rock.

My girlfriend didn’t want to climb it so she gave me half an hour. I kicked off my thongs (flip-flops for non-Oz readers) and went up as fast as I could, took a hurried picture of Mt Crookneck and got down in less than 45 minutes. Apparently the record is 39 minutes.

glasshouse

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Posted February 7, 2014
  Posted by in Uncategorized

It’s Academic

Channel 9, Adelaide.

About 1976.

I was really, really bad.

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